Chicken-heart

This is the 'mother' of all the crazy posts i have ever written.Well i wrote it a long time ago, decided i would post it. It's not an original, but inspired from a true story(like you haven't heard that before). This is the story of the hen i told you about in one of my earlier posts. I felt so moved and decided to 'slice' around with his buddies the next time i visited the butchery. Here goes 'his'tory....

Save the species. For what? life's simple. Fight or be killed, survivors code, my code and it all sounds great until you finally find confronted by a choice, a choice to make a difference or to walk away. I learned something that day.Too bad its the day i died (courtesy Vin Chik,Babylon AD).

I was born to a completely workaholic and unorthodox couple, chick mama and chick dada. Mama was employed in the egg factory, she 'worked' the eggs day in and day out. She was from a poor family so getting a 'paid job' was in itself a great achievement in our family, you can say she has a white color job. My dad was an army man or atleast he was bred 'for' the army. He was well fed and well trained in martial arts such as running, impregnate women to prolong our species, evade capture, never to even cluk when tortured and give his life at moments notice. A true gentleman. He met mama on one of his routine visits to the egg factory, they had a live-in relationship as my mom didn't like commitments and finally, me and my brother was born. My papa went for a dangerous mission to the army butchery and we never heard from him after that. Later, we heard he died at the hands of German butchers and they ate him after they killed him, those cannibals!!. Anyways, i grew up with my brother, who was obsessed with space travel after watching Armageddon at the 'window' theater of my egg factory owner. He was soo obsessed that he gave up his dreams to direct chicken 'pacino' little in one of the all time great movies and joined the space program called animal testing, where the humans send him on a white machine to space, i guess he is happy there. And i was happy with my life, until the time i found out what they were planning to do with aged hens and what horrid things they are doing with our eggs. My mother was getting older and she was finding it difficult to lay more eggs, that's when those horrid humans decided to take her out permanently. That's when i realized that our existence was for the sole purpose of feeding others and that's exactly when i realized i had no rights. None of us had and it finally was the time for rebellion, for our battle against all odds and that's when morphchickus told me i was "the One".

It was hard to cluk the fact that I was the One, but it dawned on me, all those dreams, flexing biceps, firing guns, romancing women, posing naked...ok not that...It dawned on me what all those dreams meant, that i was meant to lead. I led the resistance, i was the lone warrior sent from the future to destroy the humans once and for all. The called me arnold chicknegger. I had to devise an ingenious plan to attack the humans at their core, their food supply. I rallied the hen and called on a mass strike.Word spread,and stories began to be told on how arnie managed to strangle 10 humans at a time and how arnie lined up thousands of humans in a stadium and shat on all of them. I was becoming a legend. It happened exactly like how batchick told me, "If you make yourself more than just a chick, if you devote yourself to an ideal and if they can't stop you, you become something else entirely - a legend"

We managed to stall the humans for a while, but one of the chick lords werent too happy with this situation, they wanted their hens back and their lord status and betrayed us when we were succeeding in an attack on the egg factory owners 'omlette machine'. I was captured and here i am, waiting under the axe for the inevitable chopping of the head, to be fed to some unsuspecting human. Too bad he doesn't know i took a poison pill(editors note: on further investigation, it was revealed that the pill arnie chick took was used by humans to make chicken fatter, poor chick he didnt know what hit him). Well, the last i can do is inspire my fellow mates, I cry out, "Death is only the beginning","Freeeeeeedooomm" "cluck".

Disclaimer: No chicks were harmed in the making, ok,i lied, one, just one, thats all. Oh, alrite, many died, i am mass murderer, bohohooo....

Alrite guys, thats it, no more, i am putting an end to your misery.